Live News Inside Access - Hyperactive Nigga and a Raped Rock!!!

[Announcer] Welcome to Live News Inside Access, here's your favorite Host!!! [Talon] Well Chaniqua is at the scene as usual, and there is a black man running at high speeds, Chaniqua, Chaniqua, were you able to stop him? [Chaniqua] Yes, Talon, I have succeeded in stopping him and am about to conduct an interview. You're looking kinda active! [MC] Yeah? [Chaniqua] Well, howcome? [MC] Huh? [Chaniqua] Howcome you're so hyperactive? [MC] I drank NiggaPlosion Nigga! [Chaniqua] What is a NiggaPlosion? [MC] It's the ultimate energy drink for us black folk! [Chaniqua] Where did you buy that particular Energy Drink? [MC] What Nigga, I didn't buy it, I had two cans and they came free with my new NIGGATRONICS. Look at them shoes Nigga, look at them shoes... They be fittin' like a glove baby baby... I just want to add one last thing! Hi I'm Mack Carjackson and I was voted most likely to die by a drive by, now, thanks to NIGGATRONICS I am able to evade the incoming bullets in time! [Chaniqua] I'm out of here, back to you Talon! [Talon] Thank you Chaniqua, wonderful reporting as always, next up a story about an ancient stone infused with consciousness that claims to have been raped by Stonophillic Apes in the Rainforrest!!!... I will be back after the commercials...

[Announcer[ Call 1-800-STONELUV Now and Donate to the Campaign to end Rock Rape!
Help end Rock Rape Today!!! Call  1-800-STONELUV or visit www.stoneluv.local

 (I originally wrote that Chaniqua was down with the flu and that I was conducting the interview, but changed it at the last minute. Sayin' nigga to Chaniqua don't fit too well. I have decided to leave it as it is for now and might introduce another character. He's called Booty and likes it when you pronounce it as Bootay...)

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