Disturbed Animals - Monkey Business [101219-01]

[Announcer] Welcome to Disturbed Animals, here's your top host!!! [Talon] Welcome dear viewer, tonight we feature a story about interspecies relationships. Apparently a  male gorilla has run away with a female chimpansee to avoid being killed and are now on their way to find eternal love and happyness. We had a helicopter chasing them, I mean following them. We had to stop once they had thrown so many feces at the helicopter that the cameras were no longer able to capture footage of the event. This was actually five years ago, Chaniqua? [Chaniqua] Yes, hello everyone it's been a while, but we're back. It seems that the gorilla and the chimpansee have mated and have created a chimperilla. Yes people, it's a new hybrid species called the chimperilla and it lives off of snakes and panthers deep in the rainforrest. It's a ferocious new species that uses rocks to crush it's prey. As I am reporting they're still scraping off the feces off of the camera, the USB port is clogged and will need extensive cleaning before we can extract the footage. That was all, back to you Talon! [Talon] Wonderful reporting Chaniqua as always, next up a capybara that has earned it's drivers licence. [Announcer] We will be back after the commercials,..

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