Humor comedy Impressions Impressive, see there's the word I was seeking... (Addendum: 151 Posts as of now, all original, trying to be funny, content, no repetition whatsoever, if and or when you do see it, please contact me as I'm trying to be original as fuck)
Opinion Now - Hermafrodites [111619-0A]
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[Announcer] Welcome to Opinion Now, here's your host! [Talon] Today we are tackling a difficult subject. In the studio we have a man, or is it a woman. He or she has both bodyparts. The floor is all yours. [Hermafrodyte] Hi, I'm a hermafrodyte and I have both a penis and a vagina. With all these mental diseases like transgendering and homosexuality around the populace at large forgets about my demographic. It is time for us to unite and put those retarded concepts of non binary behind us. When the election comes, choose with your heart as well as your brain. We hermafrodytes are a marginalized part of the community and it's time our voices were also heard... [Talon] Voices heard and they hoped they were deaf, tune in next week when we interview an insane person. Now you might ask yourself the question, aren't they always insane. And yes, but next weeks interviewee is extra insane...
;This bit was in honor of The Emperor of Trolling!!! ;Sorry doing a lot of dutch humor, will switch between languages more frequently
[Announcer] Welcome to Conspiracy Now! Here's your host! [Maxis Jaxxon] Hello fellow fighters for life, freedom and prosperity. Fellow warriors and datawarriors, do I have a message for you today... I'm walking on the beach near the ocean, and the waves made me think. You see they go backwards and forwards on a constant pace of motion. It's like Eb and Fload happen at every beach! But can we be sure, have you been to other beaches around the world. I haven't and neither have most people. Don't you understand man, or woman. The answer lies at the beach, there we will find clarity of mind and finally unraveld the unpenetrable conspiracies that affect our local country. And it is up to you the viewer, think about it, plan trips to beaches around the world. We will be back after these commercials... [Maxis] Have you visited all beaches in the world, no and neither have we, now introducing Datawar Travelling, plan a trip to the beaches of the next country over for only...
[Announcer] This Saturday, save the date, do not go out to dinner, don't talk to your family... Yes, yes you're thinking what I'm thinking, throw away everything else and sit in front of the TV at twenty hundred hours, because it's the yearly event we have all been waiting for. 30 Comedians, One hour, containing the most offensive jokes in history. This years host of MCB Mega Comedy Blast will be our channels favorite host, Talon. [Talon] Hi, I'm Talon and this year I will be hosting MGC, and I promise you it will be the most offensive event in history... [Announcer] This saturday at eight, don't miss it!!! (When the Olympics happened I wasn't able to come online so I had to forfeit that effort, fingers crossed!!)
[Rick] we're about to land on this paradise planet in desperate need of saving and im going to turn you into a mouse... [Morty] A mouse... [Rick] Yes a mouse... see this planet were on... [Morty] yes, its beautiful... [Rick] yes it is, yes it is, but it won't be! If you don't impregnate her right now the planet will be destroyed within 10 years... [Morty] Oh jeez this beautiful planet within 10 years... But I don't want to have sex with a mouse... [Rick] No.... not just any mouse, the Mouse Queen... According to her fellow mice she's the most beatiful female mouse in existence! [Morty] But she's a mouse! [Rick] I'll use the DNA restructuring Injection to turn you into a mouse and then use a pink laser I got from some crazy all female planet so the Queen Mouse will look like Jessica to you... You do like Jessica don't you? [Morty] Yes, I do like Jessica... [Rick] Good, you won't even notice the difference... Want to experience Jessica Mouse with big...
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