News Today - Rikkish Cesium Manifestation [101719-0A]

[Announcer] Welcome to News Today, here's your favorite host!! This morning a dimensional portal opened up and a crazy professor with his boy sidekick at our local farm area. They were only there for 48 seconds but the damage had been done. With it came 15 crazy triggerfinger loaded with weapons aliens of whom there are still 12 alive. We now switch to Chaniqua who is on the outskirts of our City. Chaniqua?... ... Chaniqua? [Chaniqua] Hi, I couldn't hear you because of all the shooting. At this moment we still have 34 soldiers and the enemy count is down to 11. [Talon] What kind of weapons do the aliens use? [Chaniqua] Hard to say, it's definetely energy based as I keep hearing Pehtjiew Pethjiew. Right now we're under fire so I'd like to keep this short! [Talon] Very understandable, anything of note about the crazy scientist? [Chaniqua] The only thing I got was pointy hair and a heavy atmosphere of alcohol filled air. [Talon] Amazing, just amazing, we'll be back after the commercials where we will present an in depth study of the common housefly...

[Soundbite] The common housefly, is it in fact homeless? "I mean, I don't wanna call the common housefly a drifter, but does it pay rent???" [Announcer] More on this in News Today later...

[Announcer] Out now, Adolph Hitler's latest album by Dee Troit Records called Niggarapture... ♫ I'm gonna Cyklon-Beat yo ass to death, doing it with my last breath. Even tho I want to be fair, revenge and death is in the air ♪... ♫ I don't want to be no nigga, got my finga on the trigga. I'm gonna blow you all away, someday what you owe you gotta pay♪... [Announcer] Order now for only 39.99 Moneys at www.fookyoo.local. You know, Fook Yoo everytime!!

(Context, Adolph Hitler is Dee Troits artist's name. He lives across the street from Rupert, Geffrey, Marjory, Mark, Jack and Caitlyn. Besides compared to Grunbau Hitler was nothing, absolutely nothing. You know that there was no letter Y before Grunbau, they invented the letter Y in order to spell insanity!!!)

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