Welcome to Conspiracy Now - Hamster Revolution [090919-03]

[Announcer] Welcome to Conspiracy Now, here's your host!! {Maxis Jaxxon] Today I went into a grocery store and this man behind me looked at me like I was insane when I started to talk about the coming Hamster revolution. He asked me about the weather and I replied it would be cloudy since the government is spraying chemtrails across the sky to subdue the Hamster revolution. The more sunlight they get, the more dangerous they become. Have you ever encountered a rabid wild Hamster on a sunny day, well I haven't... Seems they like the shade, the real danger comes when the sun goes down. At night these rodents become ten times more dangerous, there are even reports coming in of hamsters carrying knives and guns. Like last week, when I did my jogging routine I saw a Hamster carry an actual .357 Magnum. It scared the hell out of me, and so it should do to you as well. Therefore I will give you a discount on Hamster Traps of 25% for the next two weeks. Call 1-800-DATAWAR or order online via www.datawar.com for only 23.99 Moneys, I do have an operation to run you know. Order now with discount code DEADHAMSTER for a whopping 25% off.

[Maxis Jaxxon] Do you wake up in the morning and go to bed at night, do we have the product for you. Datawar Insta Wake Up Coffee, it has so much caffeine that it'll probably become illegal within the next two months, so stock up now before it's too late. Call 1-800-DATAWAR or order online at www.datawar.local for only 16.99 a bottle...

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