The Newsaholic Season 1 Episode 10 - The Bankrobbery [091719-04]
Geffrey, what is this plank doing agains the door? Security measures! What? What? No I said what, why the hell do we need Security measures. Beats me! What? It was rupert who advised me to do so. Rupert, Rupert, where is our kittycat? Meow... Rupert, why the hell do we need Security measures on our front door? Oh, it's the Jehovas, they're doing their rounds again today. I always have a hard time to crush the heart of the little one they use as a social shield... Let's just watch TV or something...
Who peed on the carpet? Why are you asking who dad. Mark, I'm not in for a joke right now! Exactly, then why do you ask who, while you should be asking what. What? What what? I said, why do you even ask when you know it's gotta be the puppy. Rupert is housebroken, mom does not pee outside the toilet, neither do I Jack and Caitlyn. Did you pee on the carpet dad? No. Then it can only be the puppy right, why the hell ask questions of who did it when you know it's gotta be the puppy. It's not like our livingroom is a court of some sorts, no judges, no jury. Just You, the puppy, the carpet and the pee. Now which would it be? Ain't nobody got time for this, I need to get to the bank. *Geffrey rushes off to the bank*
[Bank Teller] Sir may I have your signature to open up your new bank account... [?]I will give you my signature, my weapons signature if you don't open that safe. EVERYBODY ON THE FLOOR, THIS IS A ROBBERY... [Geffrey] Aaaaaa... [?] I said get on the floor, not scream like a little schoolgirl... [Chaniqua] Are you robbin' this bank for real? I need to get to work... [?] Shut up or I'll give you a bitchslap. [Chaniqua] What did you say, did you just combine bitch and slap, this bitch ain't gonna stand for that. *Chaniqua punches bank robber KO* [Geffrey] Oh great, now security does something. If it wasn't for our favorite reporter we'd be robbed blind by one man... *Geffrey signs the contract, talks to police for a bit and walks towards his car...*
Sir, sir, can I have ten seconds of your time? Sure! Do we have an investment opportunity for you, with only three years of investment you will get... Sorry, your 10 seconds are up, I really have to go... But I haven't told you about the benefits yet... Do I get to meet rich attractive women through this program? No... Well, then No... Bye... *Geffrey calls Marjory* Marjory, can you believe it, it always starts with 10 seconds, and before you know it it's 10 minutes... I hope their mirrors are smeared with vaseline, if it was me I couldn't face myself in the mirror after spewing such inane drivling babbling insanity to unsuspecting people who are at the mall... [Marjory] Geffrey, please I have you on speakerphone. Relax, you're upsetting the children, and Rupert, stop cheering him on... [Cait]Mom... [Marjory] Cait... [Caitlyn] I no longer get upset by dads rants, you go dad, didn't you also have to say a thing about trash... [Geffrey] Well then, and another thing, garbage collectors at 7 AM, who on earth got that idea... These people clearly are incompetent... [Marjory] Geffrey, please stop, and Caitlyn, stop teasing your dad or there will be no desert for you..
Who peed on the carpet? Why are you asking who dad. Mark, I'm not in for a joke right now! Exactly, then why do you ask who, while you should be asking what. What? What what? I said, why do you even ask when you know it's gotta be the puppy. Rupert is housebroken, mom does not pee outside the toilet, neither do I Jack and Caitlyn. Did you pee on the carpet dad? No. Then it can only be the puppy right, why the hell ask questions of who did it when you know it's gotta be the puppy. It's not like our livingroom is a court of some sorts, no judges, no jury. Just You, the puppy, the carpet and the pee. Now which would it be? Ain't nobody got time for this, I need to get to the bank. *Geffrey rushes off to the bank*
[Bank Teller] Sir may I have your signature to open up your new bank account... [?]I will give you my signature, my weapons signature if you don't open that safe. EVERYBODY ON THE FLOOR, THIS IS A ROBBERY... [Geffrey] Aaaaaa... [?] I said get on the floor, not scream like a little schoolgirl... [Chaniqua] Are you robbin' this bank for real? I need to get to work... [?] Shut up or I'll give you a bitchslap. [Chaniqua] What did you say, did you just combine bitch and slap, this bitch ain't gonna stand for that. *Chaniqua punches bank robber KO* [Geffrey] Oh great, now security does something. If it wasn't for our favorite reporter we'd be robbed blind by one man... *Geffrey signs the contract, talks to police for a bit and walks towards his car...*
Sir, sir, can I have ten seconds of your time? Sure! Do we have an investment opportunity for you, with only three years of investment you will get... Sorry, your 10 seconds are up, I really have to go... But I haven't told you about the benefits yet... Do I get to meet rich attractive women through this program? No... Well, then No... Bye... *Geffrey calls Marjory* Marjory, can you believe it, it always starts with 10 seconds, and before you know it it's 10 minutes... I hope their mirrors are smeared with vaseline, if it was me I couldn't face myself in the mirror after spewing such inane drivling babbling insanity to unsuspecting people who are at the mall... [Marjory] Geffrey, please I have you on speakerphone. Relax, you're upsetting the children, and Rupert, stop cheering him on... [Cait]Mom... [Marjory] Cait... [Caitlyn] I no longer get upset by dads rants, you go dad, didn't you also have to say a thing about trash... [Geffrey] Well then, and another thing, garbage collectors at 7 AM, who on earth got that idea... These people clearly are incompetent... [Marjory] Geffrey, please stop, and Caitlyn, stop teasing your dad or there will be no desert for you..
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