News Tonight - Caged Circus Midgets [092919-04]
[Announcer] Welcome to News Tonight, here's your favorite host!! [Talon] Several caged midgets were freed today at the visiting circus that is currently performing in our town. Chaniqua is at the scene and has the inside scoop! [Chaniqua] Good evening, apparently we had a case of caged midgets in our very own town. They were locked up by the other circus people after the midgets started to form a union. The rescued fifteen midgets were not available for commentary as they still had socks in their mouths. It took five hours to free them all, because the circus owner threw away the keys. The question remains is why had the circus owner fifteen tiny cages set up before the planning started... [Talon] Awesome reporting and an intriguing question of which we will keep you updated. Next up, an insane alchemist has been arrested for killing many many goldfish, he supposedly was trying to turn the fish into actual gold animal rights activists groups report. More on this after the commercials...
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[Announcer] We are now offering the latest in hearing aid technology. It has the most sensitive receptors of all time, whispers will sound like screams. Call 1-800-CANYOUHEARME for the latest offers [Disclaimer] Warning, this product might make your ears bleed. Consult your doctor or physician before use!
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