News Tonight [082119-02]

[Announcer] Welcome to News Tonight, here's your favorite host!! [Talon] Do we have news for you, no that was not a question. Tonight, against all odds, a homeless man gave a housewarming party. Scientists are baffled and Chaniqua my favorite milk chocolate bar is on the scene. [Chaniqua] Who the hell are you calling a chocolate bar you sad excuse for white chocolate and puffed rice ass mother*bleep*. [Talon] Wow, Chaniqua, no reason to get so offensive. So, what's happening at the scene. [Chaniqua] Well apparently this man found 16 empty moving boxes and turned it into a makeshift home, he even applied for an address. The music is great, he's playing the latest album from Adolph Hitler formally known as Dee Troit. [Talon] Amazing reporting as always Chaniqua, next up, a depressed Hamster armed with a knife robbed our local bank, after the commercials. [Announcer] Please stay tuned, no, no, that's not it... Don't miss it!!!

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