Conspiracy Now [081319-02]
[Announcer] Welcome to Conspiracy Now, here's your host!! [Top Host] We all remember that a while ago the cows and the chickens fell down from outer space due to what I think to remember was because of the Genetically Engineered Housecats. But I digress, people, today the airborne chicken collective has vowed to re enter space within the next five years. Truly horrifying news people. [Female Reporter] Yeah I'm standing with the chickens here and they look proud, vital and full of determination. [Top Host] Thank you, what happened to Chaniqua? [Female Reporter] Well she's too busy with News Today and News Tonight so she had to make a choice! [Soundbite] Hell yeah I made a choice, a choice for sanity that is!! [Top Host] She will be missed, anyway, can you tell us anything more. [Soundbite] Pkokpuhkok [Female Reporter] Sorry for the soundbite I don't have anything more.. [Talon] It's your first day, don't fret about it.. [Female Reporter] What does fret mean? [Talon] Don't fret about it, you just be you, you did wonderfull!! And now we switch to a story about a secret operation ordered by the local princess against her housepet, the operation is called KILLRABBIT, more on this after the commercial break!!...
[Government Announcer] People, please stop calling 1-800-KILLRABBIT, target has been engaged, I repeat, Target has been engaged...
[Announcer] Welcome back to Conspiracy Now, here's your host!! [Top Host] We have exclusive footage from the event, operation KILLRABBIT that is. People, remember, this is all because of you, you is, I mean are, what makes the world go round. You are the ultimate resistance in human history and I salute you. We will now play the footage: "This is Alpha one going in the back door... this is Epsilon 2 entering from the east... This is Delta 3 entering from the back... *A1 kicks the door in*, E2 and D3 follow suit... This is Whiskey four, I'm outside chilling, you are you guys doing... Alpha 1, target in sight, target in sight, engaging... *took took took took took*... D3, Did you get him? Alpha? Alphaaaaaaa!!! E2, entering the hallway as we speak, Rabbit in sight, I repeat, Rabbit in sight... *throws a grenade*... *grenade explodes within Rabbit range* E2 Did you see that? I mean there's guts everywhere.. A1 well not everywhere, it was just a rabbit. Oooh, wasn't the misses supposed to cook dinner tomorrow, she'll have to do take out since this isn't a kitchen anymore. [Top Host] Did you hear that people, the rabbit was a victim of a conspiracy by the local princess. Word is she is having a fit with her 2 goldfish, but we'll save that story for another time... (format might need some edits...)
[Government Announcer] People, please stop calling 1-800-KILLRABBIT, target has been engaged, I repeat, Target has been engaged...
[Announcer] Welcome back to Conspiracy Now, here's your host!! [Top Host] We have exclusive footage from the event, operation KILLRABBIT that is. People, remember, this is all because of you, you is, I mean are, what makes the world go round. You are the ultimate resistance in human history and I salute you. We will now play the footage: "This is Alpha one going in the back door... this is Epsilon 2 entering from the east... This is Delta 3 entering from the back... *A1 kicks the door in*, E2 and D3 follow suit... This is Whiskey four, I'm outside chilling, you are you guys doing... Alpha 1, target in sight, target in sight, engaging... *took took took took took*... D3, Did you get him? Alpha? Alphaaaaaaa!!! E2, entering the hallway as we speak, Rabbit in sight, I repeat, Rabbit in sight... *throws a grenade*... *grenade explodes within Rabbit range* E2 Did you see that? I mean there's guts everywhere.. A1 well not everywhere, it was just a rabbit. Oooh, wasn't the misses supposed to cook dinner tomorrow, she'll have to do take out since this isn't a kitchen anymore. [Top Host] Did you hear that people, the rabbit was a victim of a conspiracy by the local princess. Word is she is having a fit with her 2 goldfish, but we'll save that story for another time... (format might need some edits...)
Comments
Post a Comment